"Alfalfa" (alfalfa-romeo)
06/12/2014 at 19:00 • Filed to: None
5
14|
"Alfalfa" (alfalfa-romeo)
06/12/2014 at 19:00 • Filed to: None | 5
| 14 |
As a car enthusiast/father, I love !!!error: Indecipherable SUB-paragraph formatting!!! . But sadly, little Otto will be outgrowing this beloved column before we know it. As such, I would like to nominate myself to take on the "Will It Baby" arena.
!!! UNKNOWN CONTENT TYPE !!!
Now, before we get into all of the reasons why this will never happen, let me first address a few reasons why I think it should.
First off, I have a baby. This is an important requirement, and I already have it checked off the list! Nothing for us (Or my wife) to worry about there. No taping of gorillas into Ferraris.
Second, he's not one of those weird looking babies. You all know what I mean. I feel that having a cute little guy is important in continuing this grand tradition.
Third, I can (kind of) write. Sometimes, I can put a compete thought into a sentence. On a good day, I can even compose an entire paragraph!
I feel like these three reasons make me the obvious choice, and so I am officially endorsing my candidacy for Will It Baby.
I kid, of course. Mr. Hardigree would never hand a press car over to random strangers on the internet. I'm just saying, you'll need someone new eventually. Unless Torchinsky is crazy enough to have another child...
For Sweden
> Alfalfa
06/12/2014 at 19:04 |
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The best option is for Jason to have another kid. As the kid would be used for Jason's writing, Gawker Media would reimburse all kid-related costs.
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Alfalfa
> For Sweden
06/12/2014 at 19:06 |
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That's so genius, it's almost evil.
SnapUndersteer, Italian Spiderman
> Alfalfa
06/12/2014 at 19:14 |
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Or he can call it "Will it Toddler?"
AthomSfere
> For Sweden
06/12/2014 at 19:52 |
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Heck ya, Jason will really love the Gawker provided cars for later down the road in "Will it College?"
Arch Duke Maxyenko, Shit Talk Extraordinaire
> For Sweden
06/12/2014 at 20:08 |
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That's a tax write off, no?
And who do you think will make a small version of themselves first, Hardibro or Patrick?
Makoyouidiot
> Alfalfa
06/12/2014 at 21:24 |
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I counter-nominate myself! And my boy Hammond. (yes I named him Hammond, leave me alone!)
MonkeePuzzle
> Alfalfa
06/13/2014 at 09:50 |
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you're right, we need to get him LAID!!! in as little as 9 months from now the issue could be resolved! brown chick a brown cow
RC
> Alfalfa
09/11/2014 at 21:16 |
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Why did you let that child touch your baby?
kyle242gt
> Alfalfa
09/11/2014 at 22:56 |
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How about "will it grade skool", being if you can get your kid and a 400# backpack and a clarinet to school on time and in style? I will nominate Green Truck.
Point being, any old thing will baby. Not everything will 'kid'.
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Alfalfa
> kyle242gt
09/11/2014 at 23:14 |
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Actually, I would argue just the opposite. Fitting a bulky child seat can be very difficult, but you can stuff a little kid in any back seat. Front seats too, if the car is old enough to not have airbags.
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Alfalfa
> RC
09/11/2014 at 23:17 |
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Haha if you're referring to the amp, that's hardly my baby. That's the old pos that I only kept to keep him away from the real amp right behind it.
philipilihp
> Makoyouidiot
09/12/2014 at 09:32 |
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Do you whiten his teeth and call him Hamster? Cute kid though, in all seriousness!
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kyle242gt
> Alfalfa
09/12/2014 at 15:32 |
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Totally agree, I recall the miserable days sweating like a pig trying to figure out how to get the seat mounted securely.
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Makoyouidiot
> philipilihp
09/13/2014 at 10:11 |
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Sadly no, but still awesome